I want to talk about a very sensitive and very serious subject, children. I hope that anyone that comes across this thought will take a moment to read it and or listen to the video when it is available, and think very seriously about my message, then share it. If you are a parent I am sure you will be able to relate, or perhaps you are even experiencing this situation yourself. I want to discuss a type of child abuse that many never think about when it comes to their children. I know this because I see it happening and hear of it happening every day. One is verbal abuse. We as adults get very offended, even fighting mad over someone disrespecting us, calling us names, and belittling us. But somehow we think it is ok to talk to our children this way. It is ok to call them stupid, worthless, or tell them how you believe the Dr. switched babies with you and someone else. Because there is no way a child of mine would act like you. How can you expect your child to succeed when all you do is beat them down? Everyone likes to be appreciated, respected, and rewarded. Mental, and verbal abuse is one of the leading causes of child suicide. You brought the children into this world, It is your responsibility to make their world better than your own by helping them avoid the mistakes you made. Be a parent they would be proud to emulate. Sometimes for whatever reason relationships fail and lead to separations and divorces. Divorces are hard on everyone involved, they tear families apart. Even so most often a divorce will be much better than the turmoil, mental and sometimes physical destruction in a home. As painful for you, as you believe a divorce is, it is far more painful for the children. They are often used as leverage for one to gain some sort of advantage over the other. They are told things that may or may not be true about one or the other parent to encourage them to dislike and or resent that parent. Often they are even kept from a parent out of spite and no other legitimate reason. Some children are even threatened with some type of severe punishment if they make any effort to see or talk to the parent they are kept from. If you are truly protecting a child from some type of harm that the parent they are kept from may do to them, then I salute you and support you completely. If you are using your children as leverage to get the upper hand on the spouse you are divorcing or that is divorcing you, you are a thoughtless, selfish child abuser and should not be allowed to have your children. How can you honestly expect anyone to believe that you care about a child when you use them, manipulate them, brainwash them and scar them for life with lies and deceit for your own selfish gains. You are no different than a terrorist that would strap explosives to a child in hopes of crushing an enemy. In the eye of the multitude, you are as low as they come. A child needs the love and care of both parents if it is at all possible. If you truly love your children you will encourage them to spend time with the other parent even assist if needed. If you truly care about your children you will not bad mouth the other parent to them but allow them to mold their relationship based on that other parent’s own merit. If you truly care about your children you will fill their minds with useful information and lessons, not trash talk about their other parent or even the other parent’s family. If you truly care about your children you will put aside your own needs and do everything you can to make their lives better, healthier, and more productive. Love your children with everything you have in you, they can be taken from you in a blink of an eye. Lie to them and deceive them, eventually, they will learn the truth and all your deceit will be your demise. You will lose what you so desperately tried to keep away from the other parent, finding yourself as you wanted them…..all alone.
Simply my thoughts
Dean Butler
